On Being Carefree & Divine

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

 

Ms. Dominique tweets:  On Being Carefree & Divine

“’What is God?’ ... Gee, that's an easy question. And I do sort of do have an easy answer. Not a correct one, but an easy one. It's like something that the Gnostics once said:

        ‘God is the perfection which absorbs.’ 

“I think that is the loveliest & simplest & least divisible definition of Divinity. It is this simple — to say that God is like a Carefree panty shield. 

“We know that, because we are human, we are not even 80% perfect; and yet, we have access to this amazing technology that's beyond us and that we can become absorbed by, or in, sometimes just for fifty minutes, or sometimes for a whole day; and sometimes, if you're really a blessed saint, forever! 

“Thank God for taking the time to invent the panty shield. And before that those fig leaves. Yeah, those too.“

On the Divine Inflatus

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

 

Ms. Dominique tweets:  On the Divine Inflatus (Afflatus?... I forget the spelling)

“Prayer is like a close, personal relationship, and half the job is mine. Half the benefit of Prayer is in the act of asking itself, in the offering of a clearly posed & well-considered preposition. If you don't have this, all your pleas & desires are boneless, floppy, deflated, and impotent — they never lift. 

“Even blowing on it doesn’t work. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

Ms. Dominique tweets: On Pee and the Romantic Poets

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

“I look at God the same way the English Romantic Poets did — just like William Wordsworth and Percy Shelley. I see God everywhere in Nature. My own personal mantra to Nature & God is this: 

“Just the same way the Hindus admire & enjoy watching the morning sunlight as it amuses itself on the sacred waters of the Ganges river, I love God and I want to watch God play in my pee stream. I'm just sayin' I want to. Don't judge me."

Ms. Dominique tweets: On Talking to God

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

“I’ve heard it said that the act of prayer is the act of talking to God, while meditation is the act of listening to God. I’m a pretty good talker. The listening part — not so much.”

Ms. Dominique tweets: On the Power of Prayer

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

“When my cousin drives to Wal-Mart, he pulls into the parking lot and then prays for God to help him find a parking spot. And he does! Praying for a parking spot near the front door actually works. I’ve seen him do it. This is like the “Prosperity Gospel” or like “The Secret.” Praying for parking spots works for him, and I believe it really works for everyone who truly believes in the power of prayer.

“Then, a year ago February, he was walking through the parking lot at Wal-Mart, slipped on the ice, and got run over by a preacher driving a Habitat for Humanity truck. Over the next few weeks, my cousin had surgery on both his legs, and now he can walk again (Praise Jesus!). Walking is painful but he now has a brand-new handicapped plate on his truck so he can park near the front door of Wal-Mart in the handicapped spot.

“I guess maybe God got tired of finding parking spots for him.”

Ms. Dominique tweets: On the Gift of Life

Spiritual Advice in the manner of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love”

“You were given life by God. It is your duty to find something beautiful within life, no matter how small, and then choke the living shit out of it."